Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize