I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
