3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
