i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
