its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
