he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
