so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize
