my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
areolas are like halos for boobs.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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