So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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