my room smells like sperm. sweet.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
my poor anus
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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