You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize