He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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