the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
