she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
she told me i tasted like america
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize
