she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize