I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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