She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize