belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
