I need help removing her.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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