its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I use my feet as sexual weapons
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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