I wanna passion pit in your ass
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
