My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize