A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
How many fucks given?
0.12846
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
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