Where did you get a picture of my penis
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
