Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
