Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
