what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
