My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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