He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
