at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
No subtext here. People are naked.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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