Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
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I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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