I have demons in me.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
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Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
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Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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