The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Randomize