She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I need moral support for this bender
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
