garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
