I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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