After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
