My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
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