someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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