he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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