Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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