i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
