just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work