pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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