nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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