do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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