VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
