Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize