Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
