; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize