that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Randomize
